Bless Me, Father, For I Have Sinned

Yup. I did it. And i won’t apologize and i don’t feel guilty. Well, maybe a little bit guilty. But, damn it, isn’t that one of the best parts of being an adult? Isn’t that our silver lining for having to pay bills and get wrinkles and be responsible? I mean, lets face it… Adulting sucks a lot of the time. Most of our day is taken up with work and chores and bills and staving off the crypt-keeper. It’s these frivolous, foolish, and counter-productive things that enable us to smile.

And before you judge me, let me say that you are no angel either. You, over there… Don’t think i don’t know that you lied your way out of boxing class last Friday night so you could eat ice cream in your undies while watching old Bugs Bunny cartoons.

And you, Miss Cosmo… I know you’ve got a Harlequin Romance in your nightstand, tucked under that copy of Gloria Steinem’s biography.

Keep laughing, Terry… I know you pour chocolate milk on your Reese’s Puffs in the morning and call it “breakfast”.

And Jaime, I know you were watching the Kardashians on your laptop when i walked into your office.

We all do it. We drink from the carton and put it back in the fridge. We say cusswords and we don’t even whisper them. We pee in the shower. We fall asleep with our makeup on. We flash truckers. (Please tell me i am not the only one who has done that!)  All kinds of stuff we were warned not to do, but we do them anyway. Because they are fun. And because we know we aren’t supposed to. And our parents can’t ground us for it. (Thank God!)

(Dad, if you read this, i was only kidding about the truckers.)

So when i admit that i ate nothing but two helpings of tiramisu for supper, you can’t say anything. You’d have done it, too.

So there.




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